Czechoslovakians

This is an odd, incomprehensive piece about the dysfunctional staff in a gloomy Glasgow restaurant. The chef is a foul-mouthed racist. The waiter has such low self-esteem, he can hardly keep his head out of his hands. The waitress is a bright wee thing, but, being a girl, is ignored. The washer-up assistant dogsbody kitchen person is foreign and black and doesn't speak.

There is a chilling atmosphere, as if, at any moment, something large and inhuman is going to vomit forth from the wine cellar and do unspeakable things to the bored diners. Strange noises emerge from what appears to be beer barrels. The staff talk of "Czechoslovakians" and "they're back" in the same sentence. The scene is set for slasher mayhem.

Of course, it's a tease. Or is it? There is something going on. These Czechs are definitely in the building. Are you scared? Do you care?

Ian Anderson's script relies heavily on those words that can't be written down without ***s and the acting would enhance a timber yard. You can feel imagination straining at the leash. Sadly, it is not let loose.