Ferpect Crime

Rafael (Clive Owen look-alike Guillermo Toledo) runs the ladies section in a large Madrid department store. He is a born salesman and right at home hustling the customers and womanising every single (attractive) female working for him. At the end of every shift he stays behind to have unlimited use of the store for his own pleasure. He's a happy man and loves what he does.

His worst enemy is Don Antonio, the boss of the menswear section, a man constantly rearranging his ties and socks with disturbing precision. Both are in the running for floor manager and, when Don Antonio wins by unfair default, a fight breaks out in the changing rooms, which ends with Rafael penetrating Don Antonio's head with a hanging bracket. Although the killing was a complete accident and Rafael only acted out of self-defence, he doesn't tell the cops and is horrified to discover that someone is onto him before he can dismember the body.

That person is Lourdes, a not exactly pretty girl with a not exactly stable personality, a borderline psychotic. Too stunned by the unexpected turn of events, Rafael lets Lourdes drag him deeper and deeper into a hole that threatens to become his grave and quite soon he's going to do whatever it takes to get out. It's at this point that the film becomes reminiscent of Peter Berg's 1998 black comedy Very Bad Things, although not as mean spirited and a touch more light hearted.

In the end, it doesn't really escape the Deus Ex Machina nature of this kind of movie as the mayhem escalates and two warring sides resort to increasingly desperate measures, only for everything to work out.

Although not exactly ferpect, it's still a lot of fun and miles better than Perdita Durango, a truly disgusting movie that Alex de la Iglesia was responsible for back in 1997. I was a bit worried before seeing this, as the bad taste Perdita Durango left in my mouth is still there, I was, however, relieved at the delightful silliness and forgot any previous crimes against humanity.

I really don't like Rafael's beard, though. Facial hair is reserved for Chuck Norris only.